Good Minus

My final mark in my English course was an A-. I was really disappointed with this. If I had just done better on my final, I would've got an A for sure. I guess the name of the game for me is consistency. If I can just follow through this semester in January, I can definitely improve my application to med schools.

But, considering I was always really bad at English, this is definitely an improvement. I'm pretty certain I got like a 73 in high school English. And I was not a slacker in high school.

The amount of time that this whole med school timeline has been taking had started to take a toll on my optimism. But there is a new game changer in the works for me. For almost 4 years now I had been taking a medication for mood. The medication has always given me great fatigue, but I always just managed as best as I could. And sometimes I couldn't manage. Well now, I've come up with a plan with my doctor to go off the medication, hopefully reducing my debilitating physical fatigue and giving me more energy and maybe even feeling normal again. I won't see the reduction in fatigue until at least a month from now, and it may take longer to adjust, maybe 3-6 months. Anyways this is a huge development for me because now without fatigue, I can undoubtedly perform better. Going off the medication was my idea, and my doctor was very hesitant, but I basically told him enough is enough. It is unlikely I would've been able to complete medical training with these physical fatigue levels to begin with, before even starting. My family doctor actually told me this (and I think I posted about it, hah something about how I was going to make it work). And now reflecting back, it makes a lot of sense. This whole time I thought I just wasn't getting enough sleep or eating too much fat. And while those contribute, the difference between myself on the medication and the rest of my life that I wasn't on the medication, is tremendously stark. This is always why I was hesitant to study for the MCAT. Because I didn't know if I had the physical stamina to study 8 hours a day for 3 months straight. Now I'm feeling a lot more optimistic about the MCAT.

I'm still hoping to finish much of my organic chemistry course by New Years Eve. I told myself Christmas wouldn't get in the way, but that's easier said than done. Especially if your friends are calling you every day to make sure you're coming to the Christmas party tonight. I'm going because I think it would be fun. And not going would be a bit much. So I'm going to go tonight, and I've gotta clean the house today for Christmas. On Saturday it is unlikely I'm going to do homework because all of my closest family is in town so I think we may spend the day together then have our Christmss Eve dinner. We always have our turkey dinner on Christmas Eve. So I might start up organic chemistry again on Christmas Day, then work straight through until December 31st. I self imposed a January 1st deadline because I'm writing the final exam on something like January 12th. So that will be great to finally get this course out of the way. I need to do everything right, one step at a time. And another important thing that I was reflecting on after I got my English mark was that I need to become a dedicated student again. I need to prioritize school above the business, day-to-day things, friends, and anything else that might occupy my time on any given day. I realized I need to be a dedicated student, or else med school will never happen. Dedication is an important word for being a student. It means you will always do your required work, no matter what happens. It almost implies that a student is studying for a higher purpose rather than just putting in a check mark on a box. The latter is what's I've been doing. I've been barely getting by. It's because I've been wanting to do as little as work as possible. Granted, a huge part of it is how fatigued I am every single day. But still, I think a shift in thinking needs to happen. It means less fun in my life, but it's a trade off I'm willing to take. For now I'll focus on the next couple weeks, and dedicate myself to my studies so I can finish organic chem. I'm excited to decide which course I'm going to work on after organic chem.

Anyways MERRY CHRISTMAS 🎄 to all you incredible and wonderful people. Ill enjoy it while it lasts, because in all likelihood, 36 hours from now I will be knee-deep in figuring out my 2nd (out of 6) unit of organic chemistry. I'll start the updates once I finish some more units. Talk soon take care and Merrry Xmas.