Brushing up on Math And Turning Resiliency Into Results

So I've been working on math, haven't yet finished that first assignment, but getting there. I have found that I am a bit deficient in some of the precalc knowledge that I think will be quite handy come exam time. So instead of finishing Up the first chapter, I'm going through a couple of the appendices in the back of the textbook to brush up on old knowledge. This is what has set me back a little. The appendices have dozens of questions at the end of each section as well, so I'm of course going to do those too. Hopefully this will be a good base. I'll supplement with Khan Academy at some point too.

It's strange to think it's been it's been over 8 years since I successfully completed a math course. I've registered a couple times, but never finished the courses. I also failed it in first semester of first year way back when, along with the other courses. I'm thankful for my life and happy now, but sometimes I wonder what could have been. Where would I be right now if things had been different?

I know thinking like this doesn't get me anywhere. It's just things are a lot more difficult in my basic science courses. If I can pass math and chemistry next month, it'll be my first completed science courses since the fall of 2011 (if you go by the USA definition of BCMP). These online science classes are very solitary. Just given the last decade of my life, it made me wonder if I should leave all this medicine stuff behind. It makes me sad just thinking about leaving. But as I look around, I'm realizing and thinking to myself, Hey, I've been here before...

-I had troubles excelling in my grade school courses. What did I do? I put more honest time and effort in and I performed quite well, for how new the whole studying lifestyle was to me. Along with this I became so close with my friends who had similar goals. I would describe my high school career as incredible.

-I had troubles with university. What did I do? After a certain amount of attempts, I said enough is enough and took a 1 year break. I returned to school in one calendar year and I I knew this was my last shot to keep the dream alive. I registered in 3 humanities courses and got the best grades I ever received. Also around this time I met a girl I loved and even though we aren't together anymore I have no regrets.

So many other things have happened in my life where I thought I was down and out but I just keep coming back. I was actually on my deathbed once. Maybe I'll post about it one day but no guarantees. This along with other less major setbacks in my life have shaped who I am. I just have this chip on my shoulder and a never say die attitude. My life or death experience was actually incredible. If I can fight my way through death and come back alive, all this other stuff is pretty enjoyable. My life or death experience is actually what convinced me and sealed the deal that I should try to go to medical school.

I know that I will persevere and do everything to give myself a shot at MD schools. I have the time and motivation. I just think some doubts arise in the environment of a premed. For example basically all of my good friends have considered the idea of pursuing medical school, but not one of them still is. I think if things are getting difficult, sometimes you just need a reminder of why you wanted that thing in the first place. You probably weren't wrong the first time...

Anyways, things were feeling tough but I feel a lot better after writing this. I think a question I could ask myself is, am I really trying my best right now?. If the answer is no, then the action is simple, try harder. Try the absolute hardest you could ever try at something. I mean we only have so many days on this earth. This is an idea that has resonated with me from a beautiful poem. I will share the poem soon on here soon. It's lovely because it reminds me why things in life are important.

Definitely going to get back at those math problems. Talk Soon!

Cyclohexane - A Strain-Free Ring

Right now I'm just about to read about why cyclohexane is a strain free ring. It's interesting because cyclopropane and cyclobutane exhibit lots of strain, and cyclopentane, less so. This is where I'm at in my organic chem course. I've been doing pretty well. Quite well actually. Over the holidays I did not do any work on Orgnaic chem, but since January 2nd I've put a lot of work into that course. The period between Xmas eve and New Years was time spent with my friends and family. It actually seems like so long ago because my days have been so long since then. Luckily the tasks for the business have been minimal this month as well, so I haven't lost any time to that of late. But in December I was very busy with the business.

But anyways doing this organic chem course has been an absolute grind. Long days. But it actually feels so good. I started this course a long time ago, but haven't worked on it much. But the amount of work I've done in the last week feels so good. Organic chem is the type of course that you can just get immersed in. Or I can at least. I've realized that I love that feeling of sitting down at your desk, starting to study when the sun is rising, continue onwards for hours, until the sun has gone down and still studying, learning, figuring things out and getting that "clicking" feeling each step of the way, until I t's night time. It is crazy how much you can learn in one day if you just put your mind to it and give it a good, focused, honest, sincere effort. I can't help but think what my marks would be like if I did this for every class. Speaking of which, I've realized I love the hard sciences. I just love them. I can't wait to do physics again. Physics and math were my favourite courses in high school. I was actually strongly considering doing a math degree in grade 12. Anyways it's safe to say I'm rejuvenated mentally. I'm still tired, but I'm going to be pushing through. There's still 3 weeks left in January and I'm going to see what I can do. By that I mean how fast can I go and what kind of marks can I get. I've got math, organic chem, and bio on my plate right now. Math and organic are quite time intensive, so I'm thankful for the bio "break" as well. Although I'm not sure how much of a break bio is haha. Less taxing maybe, but still time intensive now that I think about it.

Anyways I'm going to post a more specific update once I get more done. I'm about 45% of the way through my organic chem class (had to relearn parts I didn't remember from 7 months ago, and brush up on all others), and just starting the first bit of my bio and math classes. Depending on my mood I'm going to either finish a math assignment or a bio assignment, hopefully by Friday night. Although I'm aiming for Friday morning. I'm taking a little break from organic chem right now but I'll jump back into it soon. Talk soon!